DADDY.CARDS
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
I'm not a short-order cook
Poop is life
Because I said so
Wait. Why is this wet?
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
Sleep is for the weak
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
No you can't have candy for breakfast
No, you may not
I'm too old for this
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
WHYYYYYY
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
Not now honey, I have a headache
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
I'm not a jungle gym
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
Go ask your mother
I'm not made of money
No you can't fly like Superman
Can I get a refund?
I'm living in a madhouse
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
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