DADDY.CARDS
No, you may not
I'm not a jungle gym
Can I get a refund?
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
I'm too old for this
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
Because I said so
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
Wait. Why is this wet?
No you can't fly like Superman
I'm not made of money
Go ask your mother
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
Poop is life
I'm living in a madhouse
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
Sleep is for the weak
I'm not a short-order cook
No you can't have candy for breakfast
WHYYYYYY
Not now honey, I have a headache
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
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