DADDY.CARDS
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
Can I get a refund?
No, you may not
Go ask your mother
Sleep is for the weak
I'm living in a madhouse
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
Poop is life
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
Because I said so
I'm not made of money
No you can't fly like Superman
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
I'm not a jungle gym
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
WHYYYYYY
Not now honey, I have a headache
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
No you can't have candy for breakfast
I'm too old for this
I'm not a short-order cook
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Wait. Why is this wet?
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