DADDY.CARDS
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
Because I said so
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
I'm too old for this
Wait. Why is this wet?
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
No you can't fly like Superman
Sleep is for the weak
Not now honey, I have a headache
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
I'm not made of money
Poop is life
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
I'm not a jungle gym
I'm not a short-order cook
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
WHYYYYYY
No, you may not
No you can't have candy for breakfast
I'm living in a madhouse
Can I get a refund?
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
Go ask your mother
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