DADDY.CARDS
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
I'm not made of money
I'm not a short-order cook
WHYYYYYY
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
Not now honey, I have a headache
Poop is life
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
Wait. Why is this wet?
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
No you can't fly like Superman
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
I'm living in a madhouse
No you can't have candy for breakfast
No, you may not
Go ask your mother
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
Sleep is for the weak
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Because I said so
I'm too old for this
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
I'm not a jungle gym
Can I get a refund?
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