DADDY.CARDS
Wait. Why is this wet?
Sleep is for the weak
I'm not a jungle gym
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
Not now honey, I have a headache
No you can't fly like Superman
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
I'm living in a madhouse
I'm not a short-order cook
Poop is life
Go ask your mother
WHYYYYYY
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
No, you may not
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Because I said so
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Can I get a refund?
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
I'm too old for this
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
I'm not made of money
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
No you can't have candy for breakfast
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
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