DADDY.CARDS
I'm not a jungle gym
No you can't have candy for breakfast
I'm too old for this
Wait. Why is this wet?
I'm living in a madhouse
I'm not a short-order cook
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Go ask your mother
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
No, you may not
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
Poop is life
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
I'm not made of money
Sleep is for the weak
WHYYYYYY
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
Because I said so
Can I get a refund?
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
Not now honey, I have a headache
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
No you can't fly like Superman
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
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