DADDY.CARDS
I'm living in a madhouse
Poop is life
No you can't fly like Superman
No you can't have candy for breakfast
WHYYYYYY
Go ask your mother
Sleep is for the weak
I'm not made of money
I'm not a short-order cook
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
No, you may not
Can I get a refund?
Wait. Why is this wet?
Not now honey, I have a headache
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
Because I said so
I'm too old for this
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
I'm not a jungle gym
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
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