DADDY.CARDS
I'm not a short-order cook
Go ask your mother
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
No you can't fly like Superman
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
Sleep is for the weak
I'm living in a madhouse
I'm not a jungle gym
Can I get a refund?
Wait. Why is this wet?
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
No you can't have candy for breakfast
Because I said so
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
Poop is life
I'm too old for this
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
WHYYYYYY
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
I'm not made of money
No, you may not
Not now honey, I have a headache
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