DADDY.CARDS
Because I said so
No you can't fly like Superman
I'm too old for this
I'm not a short-order cook
Wait. Why is this wet?
Not now honey, I have a headache
WHYYYYYY
No you can't have candy for breakfast
I'm not made of money
I'm not a jungle gym
I'm the boss oh who am I kidding
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Please go to sleep
I'm not arguing with a tiny dictator
No we can't get a pet dinosaur
I'm living in a madhouse
Sleep is for the weak
Silence is golden but impossible with kids
I'm outnumbered and outgunned
Poop is life
Parenthood the toughest job you'll ever love
Go the fu... fudge to sleep
I'm going to teach you so many swear words
Can I get a refund?
No, you may not
I'm raising tiny humans not animals
I love you but I wish you were unconscious
Go ask your mother
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